I began this blog entry thinking I'd come up with a pretty clever angle on my perspective on cars. My starting point was going to be the familiar phrase, "Americans' love affair with the automobile."
To accurately refer to the origin of that phrase, which I thought was from a 1960s TV commercial, I Google'd it and discovered that my angle was not original.
Katharine Alvord and Stephanie Mills recently wrote a book entitled "Divorce Your Car!: Ending the Love Affair with the Automobile," which I now intend to purchase as soon as I can bike down to the local book store. For now, however, let me share my own reasons for the divorce before I can be accused of plagiarism.
First, if you're married to your car, you've probably realized he has a serious drinking problem -- gas, oil, transmission fluid, brake fluid, anti-freeze -- and admit it, you're an enabler. Doesn't it seem like every time you turn around, he's ordering a drink? As a cycluter, I smell it on his breath every day. It's so bad it makes my eyes water.
And talk about high-maintenance! Isn't he becoming more and more demanding and difficult to support as the relationship goes on? How much money are you spending on him every year? Add it up. (Don't forget that insurance policy you have on him.) He's not exactly a cheap date, is he?
Sure, maybe he holds you tight and keeps you warm on cold winter mornings, but that's only if he wakes up when you turn the key. Sure, he takes you where you want to go, but you get lazier and more dependent on him all the time all the time. He needs you to take care of him, and you need him to take care of you. Can you say "co-dependence?"
Think about it. Should this relationship be saved?
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3 comments:
Sometimes I think the term 'car' is short for carnage. If you ride a bike at all you cannot help but notice everything from butterflies to deer carcasses littering the roads, killed by cars. Maybe we can come up with an acronym for this too... killuter? for auto commuters?
so your car is a he? you must have outfitted it with some of these?
http://www.thenutshop.com/
otherwise it would be an 'it'
Too funny, Doug. I love the killuter suggestion! You seem to have as many deep-seated issues with cars as I do. I just hope we never join the butterflies and deer as roadkill someday. And yeah, about that car gender thing ... just literary license to enhance the "relationship" angle. And I know most people think about cars as "shes," but I decided to take a shot at using a gender context that might appeal more to female bloggers. Ultimately, whether you think of them as male, female or neuter-gender, cars are a curse.
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